On Many Words

Mere talkativeness with those whose character is contrary to our own is enough to disturb the inner life of an attentive person.

But most pitiable of all is that this can quench the fire which our Lord Jesus Christ came “to cast upon the earth” (Luke 12:49)—the fire of human hearts; for “nothing so cools the fire breathed by the Holy Spirit into the heart of a monk for the sanctification of his soul as association with others, many words, and conversation, except that which is with the children of the mysteries of God, which leads to the return of His understanding and drawing near to Him”8 (St. Isaac the Syrian, Homily 8).

One must be especially on guard against association with women, for just as a wax candle, though unlit, placed among lit ones melts away, so the heart of a monk imperceptibly grows weak from conversation with women. Concerning this, St. Isidore of Pelusium also says: “If (as Scripture says) ‘bad company corrupts good morals’ (1 Cor. 15:33), then conversation with women, even if it be proper, is nonetheless powerful enough to corrupt the inner person secretly through impure thoughts; and though the body remain pure, the soul will abide defiled. For what is harder than stone? What is softer than water? Yet constant application overcomes even nature. If nature, which is barely moved, is moved and suffers and is worn down by the very thing it counts as nothing, how shall human will, which is easily swayed, not be overcome and overturned by long habituation?”9 (St. Isidore of Pelusium, “Letters,” 284).

Therefore, in order to preserve the inner person, one must restrain the tongue from many words: “A wise man maintains silence” (Prov. 11:12) and “he who guards his mouth preserves his soul” (Prov. 13:3); and one must remember the words of Job: “I made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I think about a young woman?” (Job 31:1), and the words of the Lord Jesus Christ: “Everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matt. 5:28).

One must not reply to anyone about any matter before having first listened: “He who gives an answer before he hears is folly and shame to him” (Prov. 18:14).