Chapter 44
On the Jesus Prayer and Hope in God
44.2.1 May the mercy of God be with you!
44.3.1 I’m very glad that my ‘Reminders to Nuns’ made a good impression on you. I myself read them with pleasure, and they seem so fresh to me that it’s as if I hadn’t written them—and if I were to try writing sermons now, I couldn’t write them the same way anymore. The distinctive mark of my sermons—these and all the others—is that they are not composed. Usually, in the evening after Vespers I’d drink a glass of tea, read the next day’s Gospel, then the Apostle reading… and whatever thought came to mind and took hold of my attention and heart, that I’d take as my theme… and the sermon would build itself inside. An hour, an hour and a half, at most two… and the sermon was ready… in the morning you’d read it through and touch it up a bit. Sometimes external circumstances would give the theme, as used to happen when visiting monasteries… but the process was always the same. These are written improvisations; since they didn’t come from the head, they present something sweetened.[1] Well, we’ll see how other similar booklets strike you. There will be six or seven of them; two or three times as many as that.
44.4.1 I follow after your letter.[2] You’ve painted a beautiful picture of your new dwelling, and it’s especially good that you know how to find the advantageous side even in what seems disadvantageous. We can hope that the disadvantage will vanish entirely before your attention, and what remains—the advantage alone—will turn your life into paradise.[3] Grant it, Lord! The despondency that comes – it’s from lack of habit. Arrange the hours so that not a minute passes without an appointed task. Let reading with reflection, prayer with prostrations, and some simple handwork take up all your time – and there won’t be time to be bored or despondent. That church services are infrequent – that’s a great deprivation. But, God willing, prayer at home will become established... Learn to act this way: as soon as you have no task at hand, immediately take up the Jesus Prayer and begin to say it with attention, whether walking, sitting, or – best of all – standing before the icons. You can set aside special times for this. This will be better, and your skill in this prayer will take deeper root. The thought of moving into eternity fits well with your circumstances; but it always has its place in everything. Bind it to your intellect and heart, and look at everything else through it. Your account of what happened with Aksakov is very instructive. I have heard before about the errors in NN’s judgments. You desire to unite your intellect with the thought of the Lord. The best way to do this is through practice of the Jesus Prayer, as written above. Set aside three or four times a day to stand before the icons to say this prayer reverently and with the vision of the Lord before you, and say it each time a hundred, two hundred, three hundred times, as you are able. Once you’ve set the time for this, don’t cancel it. Your thought all day will see ahead... there, there I must stand.[4] And the Lord will be near Thought about one’s own affairs is also near. The beautiful NN wrote.[5] May the Lord show His mercy to them! The mercy of God shall surround those who hope in the Lord. But do they truly hope? The feeling of hope in God is a great work. It is the sum of all our feelings toward God, especially a deep faith in God’s providence over us.
44.5.1 I give thanks for the news about His Grace Archbishop Leontius.[6] I can barely restrain myself from writing to the bishop. But I’ll wait a bit longer to hear what you have to say.
44.6.1 Do people write to him, and does he reply? In the meantime, I’ll pray all the more earnestly several times a day.
44.7.1 May the Lord bless you!
44.8.1 Be saved!
44.9.1 Bishop Theophan.
44.10.1